Why Love Still Feels Unfinished?
After writing the previous chapter, I realized that love is the one place where my growth still feels unfinished. I’ve learned to stand on my own, to rebuild my work, my values, my sense of self. I’ve learned to be patient with solitude and disciplined with my fears. But love doesn’t respond to effort the way other parts of life do. It resists structure. It exposes what remains tender. And maybe that’s not a failure, but an invitation—to look more closely at how I connect, what I protect, and what I’m still afraid to ask for. I don't understand why it has been so difficult—almost impossible—for me to find what they call love. At forty, I found myself feeling like I’m not enough for someone, like my way of loving is wrong, like I’ve failed in my past relationships. There haven’t been many, but I’ve learned from each of them. Still, there’s an emptiness they’ve left behind, and at times I truly believe I was born to be alone. I’ve talked about this often with my therapist. He tells...